Roots

If you knew, or didn’t, the famed book “Roots” about the slave trade took place in the Gambia. Every few years they have a festival and African Americans and hippies from all over the world come to find their roots. I took my rare trip up to the official capital of Banjul to see the opening ceremonies which were taking place in July 22^nd Stadium, right next to the presidential palace. I really like the feel you get walking the streets of Banjul, it has a gritty wild west feel with a distinct West African backdrop. I couldn’t help but feel like I was in a movie lot and that as soon as I turned the corner Steven Spielberg would be there on a directors chair yelling “cut!”.

The parade was very nice, the best part was me getting to walk on ACTUAL GRASS! You take it for granted in America but if you’ve been to west Africa you’d know. Delegations from all the neighboring west African countries walked with their traditional costumes across the stadium. Individual groups walked also, two were pretty hilarious: The “Bumpster Rehabilitation Project” acronym: BRP (if you’ve read my previous blog on Bumpsters you will find that funny, and the “United Gun Shot Hunting Society” with a sign that read “We are number one!”… TIA that’s all I have to say. So yes, thank you UGSHS for raping and pillaging your countries only gem, leaving it with few forests and less than spectacular wildlife. Golden tailed fence lizards aren’t exactly bringing in the tourists.

As the roots festival went on they began to introduce the president, RET COL Alh. Dr. Yahya Abdul-Aziz Jemus Junkung Jammeh. His escort car came first. A brand spanking new Nissan Titan with the added accessory of a 50 caliber duel barrel riffle secured to the bed (I recommend that edition). After the Titan came Jammeh’s vehicle, and extra large stretch hummer and the president waved out the top and threw cookies and t-shirts to the crowd. He usually carries a scepter but he must have left it at home today. Katie and Jennie actually got to shake his hand which was awesome.

After all this excitement we had to use the bathroom. By some strange coincidence we were escorted into the presidential palace and were sat down in the fully air-conditioned waiting room, very nice. This is the same waiting room that dignitaries from around the world sit in. Everyone from the British prime minister to the president of Taiwan… to Steven Snyderman sat here. We smoozed with the guards drank their water and shat in their toilets, it was great! It’s amazing how much racism and celebrity you can get from merely being a white person in west Africa. It’s both utterly disgusting and hilarious at the same time. Getting back to Fajara was a pain in the ass, as it had already gotten dark we were subjected to the obstacles of once again being white in the middle of the night in a bad neighborhood, trying to hail a cab back to the stodge. We had to pay a little extra but the 5 of us crammed into a 4 person taxi. The driver had told us that if we were stopped by the police and were caught in an over crammed taxi, we would be responsible for the bribe money (a hundred or so dalasis). So off we speed down the Banjul highway and what do you know but a military check point greets us at the end of the road. Our hearts pump, I can see it now turning into a typical movie: being taken into custody, forced to give a cavity search, jail time haha. The smallest of us, Jenni, hid under Shayla and I acting like I had a headache placed my arm over her to cover the rest of her torso. We greeted the guard as we stopped, “Salaam Alekium officer, how is the evening?” We were giddly smiling, obviously up to no good, but the officer was preoccupied with a side conversation that he just waved us on… sigh. We broke into laughter and continued our way back rocking out to Akon (the Gambians love him).

On a side note, I found the festival slightly hypocritical. Only in Africa would they spend a ton of money and time bringing people from all over the world to celebrate the end of slavery and the afflictions that were brought on the black people; but here’s the kicker: the Gambia’s northern ally, Mauritania, only recently (2 years ago) abolished slavery and still today hosts indentured black servants in Arab compounds. So yes, curse those American bastards who enslaved our people, how f-ing dare they! But our neighbors to the north can feel free to continue to oppress the black people, it’s ok, because of course, they’re our Muslim brothers… sigh. The racism of Arab Africans to Black Africans (though both practice Islam) I could debate was worse and without a doubt longer lasting than the plight of the black people in America; but that's just one man's opinion and one man's alone. Welcome to Africa yall.